So, I just added yet another year to my, ‘years survived humanity’ score, and despite the dread of that number’s expanse, every year I look forward to my cycle ending to celebrate myself and all the things I love for an entire week.

Yes, one whole week is what I take, Birthday Week is legal, and necessary. Why not grant yourself a whole week of selfish indulgences? You are the one steering the ship of your life, year after year, your captaincy deserves rewarding.

Birthday week celebrations traditionally combine varied and well-appointed mini celebrations that add up to a week-long festival of self. Upholding my own tradition, this year’s venues included a shopping centre bar (Bryan Brown would have been proud – Cocktails and Dreams – need I spell it out), a riverside bar, CBD Japanese stalwart, Northside dancing and beer drinking, daytime cinema, an old school spaghetti house and a hipster wine bar – a veritable buffet of all this town has to offer. And smack bang in the middle of it all was the highlight – a Saturday night tipple with some of my best gals at a heart-achingly cool city venue.

I found my happy place.

New kid on the CBD block, Heartbreaker, is reminiscent of the old days when I was young and free and lived in dive bars and complete with all the feels of such a time; sticky carpet, attitude, loud rock and dim lighting – without all the stuff my older self can’t handle anymore (sticky carpet, attitude, bad lighting and loud people!)

I read about Heartbreaker just before it opened back in August and eagerly awaited my opportunity to revel in a city bar that didn’t make me dry-reach from the uncomfortable soundtracks and over-decorated cocktail lists. So when curating Birthday Week this visit was already clearly etched in the schedule.

Situated on the corner of Lonsdale and Russell streets, smack bang in the middle of no-man’s land, Heartbreaker is the sort of bar you only wished you’d just stumbled across late one Thursday night, following a row with your lover/best friend/ boss. (Carrying your heartbreak on your sleeve.)

The moment you walk in off the street you feel like you have walked onto the set of a vampire version of Cheers. The place where everybody knows your name, and quite likely,  one of them will suck your blood before night’s end. But don’t let this deter you.

Thankfully my experience was more Cheers and less True Blood (although a lap-dance with Eric would have been a welcomed birthday gift.)

I ordered my first (well not strictly first, but first for the evening) birthday drink, and the cute, gothic, pseudo-school- girl behind the bar poured a perfectly mixed Negroni from the most adorable bottle – packaged by their sister bar, The Everleigh.

Housed in the glass was one giant icecube and one large and curly twist of zest. It was a swift and painless procedure, and although the drink prices weren’t quite as painless ($18 a pop), it was worth it to be able to be served a cocktail in a city bar without pretense – because sometimes you just don’t want to drink beer.

I grabbed my Negroni and wandered through to the back of the bar where my party sat tucked up in a booth, undisturbed by bright lights or tacky decor. The staff are super friendly and the soundtrack is on point.  Queen, Bob Marley (the heavier tracks), Led Zeppelin, Fleetwood Mac and Blondie to name just a few. And the music is loud.

Further back in the room is a pool table overlooked by a wall of rock’n’roll fame. With wooden venetians blocking out the city streets and the blood red hues of the decor, I felt like I had been shot straight into the barrel of a 1970s gangster film –  strangely, right at home – and tho my heart didn’t quite break, it was near enough to melting at the nostalgia of it all.

I give Heartbreaker, 4 and a half, burnt out seventies rockstars out of 5.